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Stop striving, Start allowing

Is it possible to be successful without striving?

The answer is a big resounding YES!


In fact, it is possible to be MORE successful AND happier and healthier if you allow rather than strive.


Here’s why…..striving

Striving means to:

  • exert oneself vigorously
  • try hard
  • make strenuous efforts toward any goal
  • compete
  • struggle vigorously, as in opposition or resistance


Allowing on the other hand means to:

  • permit something to happen or to exist


Which of those two definitions feels easier?


That’s right, the second one.  Now, notice how it feels to open up to the possibility that achieving success could be easier.  That it could come from allowing something to happen rather than forcing it to happen through brute force or sustained effort.


Many of us have developed the false impression the more effort we put in the more reward we will receive.   Allowing creates more potential reward from less effort.


arrowAllowing is not about sitting back with your feet up and waiting for good things to come to you.  In fact, allowing involves a lot of energy too.  It is just that instead of pushing your energy towards one fixed point, you set the direction you want to go in and you then allow your energy to be pulled towards your goal (a bit like firing an arrow into the distance,  you can’t necessarily see the tree it has hit but you know the direction you need to go in to find it).


If that still sounds a bit flaky then try an experiment to see how this works.


Think about something you’d like to achieve but you haven’t yet worked out how to make it happen.  It might be writing a blog, starting a business, learning a language, finding a partner, changing jobs.  Choose something that you feel motivated towards, something that sparks a sense of excitement, anticipation or inspiration in you.


Then fire your arrow.  Take a moment to sit, take a few breaths, bring to mind your goal and then ask the question “what would have to happen today for me to move a step closer to achieving x?”.


Don’t seek out an answer, simply let the question hang there.  Every day repeat this and notice what happens. Stay open to things happening that you don’t initially expect or anticipate or which don’t at first strike you as being related.  It may be an idea comes to mind, you may meet someone who you realise could help you, you might read something on line or even on a bill board which prompts you to do something or it might just be a shift in how you feel about your goal, a gut sense about what you need to do.


Whatever it is for you, allowing your experience to unfold takes less effort, is more fun and makes sense because you can’t control everything anyway!


If you found this blog useful you might like to check out this one – Pushing Water Uphill


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